I was just about to fall asleep, when I started getting worried. am I too particular?
this year at formal, I pulled my good friend aside and asked him how to break someone's heart, something I have yet to do, but I somehow feel that I did it without realizing, but alas, even though I asked him he said that he was quite possibly the worst candidate to answer this question, and he gave me the typical answers and I felt stuck, as usual.
he asked, "you're still not over him, are you."
I said, "not a fucking chance."
it's weird, this stuck feeling. guys have liked me, I have liked guys, but yet to be completely honest I could care less about them. it seems like this one person who occupys my mind at the moment just won't leave, and I can't consider anyone else. I problably would've dated this other guy, but I didn't feel comfortable going through with that when I'm thinking about someone else so often. I didn't feel like giving it a chance. I don't think I wanted to have thoughts of him leave. he doesn't feel the same way about me, but I just can't stop.

I have worse problems, so it's okay for the time being. the reason I'm writing this post is that I don't want to go through high school feeling like I wasted my time.